KELLY CLARKSON : I Do Not Hook Up

So there’s Kelly – surrounded by toffee-nosed rich bitches with all their floral displays and flowers and champagne and pastels and she’s thinking ‘gosh, but I really don’t want to be here… I wonder if that handsome young man pOpping his cork might like to whisk me away from all this?’. So then she does what any normal girl in her position at a society luncheon would do – she throws him on the table and attacks him, much to the horror of the other guests. Alas, it turns out to be a dream. Then, the singer’s at the pub, making eyes at some smooth-looking pool-playing type on the other side of the room, thinking ‘I wonder if that handsome young man getting his balls into the corner pocket might like to whisk me away from all this?’. So then she does what any normal girl in her position at a pub would do – she starts dancing wildly on the bar. Alas, she falls off and makes a complete ass of herself. But was it all a dream again!? You’ll just have to watch to find out.

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